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Before we carry on I am going to clarify that I am neither a Doctor, Psychiatrist nor Counsellor, I have something that sometimes people forget about, experience of everything I am about to discuss and hopefully, you will read and possibly it may benefit some. Who knows, at least you’ll know your not alone and you can get through it.
Well, this is never an easy subject to discuss and in all honesty, it should be we should be able to feel able to discuss anything within our forums and it’s strange that in this day and age of communication and social media we do not communicate constructively instead creating fabrications of what our lives look like to the onlookers, this creates an environment perfect for toxic people to influence you further. So what does that mean to me? What are the signs I should be looking for? More importantly, what do I do about it all?
I happened across a fantastic post Toxic People: 12 Things They Do and How to Deal with Them – Hey Sigmund where the writer Karen Young identifies 12 key characteristics to look out for and how to deal with them, and you know what as I read through them they hit home over past experiences that I have had in personal and work relationships, so now I feel it’s important to share some of my experiences with you however of due to copyright laws we cannot replicate them directly here from the Hey Sigmund website however I can talk about the points from my own experience in life and hopefully that will give you a little appetite to read further.
Ok, So here goes;
Here’s the thing people who carry that toxicity know that decent caring people will go to extreme lengths to make them smile to keep them happy this is the truth and they suck upon the good nature of people like a succubus, draining the goodwill, care and love from the person. So, if you are finding that you can no longer make the person smile maybe you need to stop, leave them to it for a while and re-engage once the mood has lifted, you cannot nor should you be responsible for how other people feel. And in all situations should be able to talk about it.
We, me, you don’t owe anything to anyone, we have to remember that because the thought of being indebted to someone keeps us firmly in their grasp. Remember always make sure you have a safe place away from the toxicity of the person to give you time.
This is a never-ending and vicious circle that will eliminate you from social networks, sapping your positivity and spark making you subservient but, here’s the thing once they have drained you of your very being you become surplus to requirement, no longer entertaining a bore “that’s your fault, what happened to you” they will say “you used to be fun and full of life” So never lose connections with your long term friends or family over a partner, if they disapprove of someone don’t be too quick to dismiss their concerns listen to them, and remember you always have a choice and nothing is helpless.
I’m coming to the point now where I don’t know if it’s worth writing anymore so we will see what the SLE Community say, if it’s received well I will most certainly continue to write some more, this is all written from personal experiences through my life and I have tried to be careful regarding the content and maintained a general overall the aim is to simply say guys you are 100% not alone in any of this and you don’t deserve it nor should you settle for it.
Let me know what your thoughts are 🙂
Thanks for taking the time to read this little post guys, and like I said if you want more let me know!
Written by: Jay
These Thrilling Lies